Avox in Arcadia (perpetual) wrote,
Avox in Arcadia
perpetual

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Kairos has a conversation with Bones Season 6.



KAIROS: Okay, S6. Don't take it personally but at this point I'm really only here out curiosity. I'm not expecting that much out of you.

BONES S6: What? Well, will Brennan and Daisy making sexy poses at native savages change your mind?

KAIROS: No it will not.

BONES S6: How about a few minutes of Booth as an epic war hero? Oh, and he has a new girlfriend.

KAIROS: NO.

BONES S6: Sweets playing piano?

KAIROS: No. Well, maybe.

BONES S6: Hodgins and Angela are pregnant.

KAIROS: ....Fine. You got me.

BONES S6: Great! So about this new girlfriend. She's a plucky female reporter. She's totally hot and not that good with kids. We're looking at a real future for her and Booth.

KAIROS: Yeah see not that interested. I already know Booth and Brennan are pregnant by the end of the season, so this is obviously not going to last. Not like I would expect it to anyway. Seriously, a brand new character as the male lead's love interest? Personally I'm fairly convinced she's going to die.

BONES S6: OMG WHO SPOILED YOU?

KAIROS: Just do your job. I notice that Angel-shaped bastard is wearing a shirt again. Fix it.

BONES S6: Maybe, but in the meantime, can I interest you in Sweets and Daisy's sexcapades?

KAIROS: ...

BONES S6: Okay, let's pretend that didn't happen. So, here's Cam.

KAIROS: Yeah, when did she get so unlikable? This whole business with cheating on Michelle's college applications, what is that. And boy do I not care about her boyfriend beyond wanting him to get off my screen as soon as possible. What the...? Why does Sidereel keep cutting out on me? Bones S6, why will you not cooperate?

BONES S6: So you do want to watch.

KAIROS: Don't make this personal!

BONES S6: So i herd you liek deaf-mute orphan children.

KAIROS: Huh? What does that have to do with - AUGH THAT POOR GIRL WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME MAKE IT STOP!

BONES S6: Sure, whatever you say. Hey, you like the squinterns, right?

KAIROS: Most of them. Arastoo and Vincent are my favorites. I wonder if the rotation is going to change next season thanks to Wendell getting the internship. It's okay, I like Wendell a lot now that he's not dating Angela. The whole thing with the potatoes was pretty great, and DID YOU JUST SHOOT VINCENT?!

BONES S6: *whistles*

KAIROS: HE'S REALLY DEAD. YOU KILLED VINCENT.

BONES S6: Aw, don't cry. Look, his death has finally bought Booth and Brennan together.

KAIROS: Yeah whatever! I don't even ship Booth/Brennan! And I already knew this was going to happen and I thought that was supposed to be the big twist of the season! ...Wait, actually this is kind of sweet. I DON'T FORGIVE YOU.

BONES S6: And also, listen to what Hodgins and Angela named their baby.

KAIROS: You've done enough. Leave my ovaries out of this.

BONES S6: So, next season...?

KAIROS: You're evil and I will be there.
Tags: bones
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